The Sound of "A Mother's Cry" During the Holidays!

The assumption is that everyone looks forward to celebrating the holidays. That all of us live in anticipation of the gatherings of loved ones, the singing and dancing, the sharing of meals and gifts. As the holidays approach, there is a notable change in the air. Children and adults alike appear to contain almost combustible energy full of excitement. This time of year, people seem to love more freely and are visibly kinder.

Yet, for hundreds of thousands of us, this is not a reality. The sound of our “cry” is altered.

Our reality is that the 13th Amendment legalized slavery and gave it a different name, “mass incarceration.” This reality opened the door for the prison industrial complex, and THIS is the system that manipulates our lives during the holiday seasons. The sound of a mother’s “cry” changes during the extremely dark hours of uncertainty and having a child warehoused on a concrete plantation are dark hours.

It is extremely challenging to rejoice and celebrate when your heart is broken. When a piece of your heart is outside of your body and is now the property and commodity of a system. A system established to destroy them. When you live in constant fear knowing that your child resides in a toxic environment designed to break their mind, body and spirit. How can you sing songs of jubilation when you are wondering if your child, the fruit of your womb, is being abused and mistreated?

As an advocate and the face of my nonprofit organization, “A Mother’s Cry” I consistently speak with mothers across the nation who experienced unexplainable pain during the holidays. Realizing that we have little to no control in this situation, we look forward to calls and video chats received via the subpar prison communication system, because even a few moments of hearing our child’s voice is better than no communication. Many of us mothers cannot even remember the last time that we spent the holidays in our homes with our loved ones. Although the sound is different.

During these times, we have been forced to alter our holiday experiences. Some of us continue family traditions with some notable changes, while others of us have discontinued family traditions all together. I have spoken with mothers who purchase gifts for their incarcerated loved ones with plans to give the collection of gifts to them when they come home.

Other mothers say that they are just focused on their other children and loved ones and avoid mentioning the incarcerated one so as not to disturb the celebration times.

Whatever a mother decides to do, she is aware of the emptiness in her soul. The empty place in her arms. These voids are realistic for us. The sound of her cry has changed.

As I walk this journey with these mothers, realizing that we are united in a journey that we did not ask for, I encourage self-love and expression. Acknowledge and embrace YOU during this time. Write what you feel and think in a journal. Share your feelings with loved ones who you trust to truly hear you.

We identify a sense of helplessness but refuse to be hopeless. We express that we are disappointed but refuse to be devastated. We remember what it was like to carry this special gift in our wombs and how we now carry them in our hearts, and we journey on.

The sound of our “cry” changes during the holiday season but it is not silenced. We remain a Voice and our actions speak out loud.

“Happy Holidays, Moms!”